Well if you are going to be a Callender you have to learn to get down with the best of them. Sister Girl has reached that important mile stone...enjoy!
Aug 19, 2009
First day of Kindergarten
I let out some tears this morning on the way to school with Ian. Not really because I was sad but because I was so happy we had finally made it to this year. He has been waiting to go to this school with his big brother & finally he gets to. He is now officially a big boy like Eli! He was nothing but smiles as he put on his new star wars shirt this morning. He told me as he was getting out of the car "Mom, I'm so happy!" I had to really stop and think...did he just say that. My boys don't always express their feelings (other then "I'M ANGRY!" towards each other). I will give last year credit for preparing him maturity wise for this year in school. He is very ready academically to be challenged and thankfully his teacher is prepared to do that with many of the older kids in the class. When I picked him up he told me every detail of his day (I'm not used to that...) and was excited about going a full day on Friday. I realize that sometimes we must all bear things that are not fun and are challenging in order to get to another stage where we can enjoy finally being there! (Ian's old school vs. this year) So, enjoy the pictures as they tell the story of Ian's first official day. I must add Eli is in his first full week of 2nd grade and seems to love it! His teacher "has a loud voice" but he is getting use to it. He is playing the shy card this week but I know once he gets use to Mrs. L he will show his true (and outgoing) colors.
Aug 17, 2009
I guess it's like gaining weight
Like gaining weight in that you don't realize you are doing it pound by pound until you see the consequences: paints won't button, underware lines show in the trunk, cheeks look a little poofy, feel a little tired walking up that "hill".
What is it? Disciplining your children. When they are young it seems like a daily/hourly chore to stay on top of your child's behavior. They are so (well, mine rather) me focused that you constantly are guiding them to share, apologize, not hit, say thank you. But when they get to that age...you know what that age is...I guess it is different for everyone...you realize "oh, it's been awhile since I had to correct little sammy" or "wow I haven't had to whip out the old tree branch in awhile" (ha ha ha --- had to put that).
I think along the lines of gaining weight slowly you also get used to certain things your children creep back into doing. You get lazy; they get smart or sly or maybe just persistent; you get distracted; they find new ways of doing the same thing. And then one day you realize Little Sammy has not been doing what I ask the first time (or second or third) in quite awhile. Actually, L.S. has been making these horrable whining noises along with rolling his eyes & putting a weird sarcastic tone to all his answers...and I have been in some zombie zone the whole time!
ENOUGH IS ENOUGH...CRACK DOWN! And then excuse my language but all hell brakes loose. The child who has learned that his parents had become zombies to his ill behavior now is having to step up and he doesn't like it. And at that point you have a choice. Do I go back to the numbing sensation of letting my child whine and having to tell him 10 times to do something or do I make a choice now to correct what is wrong and plow back to the straight and narrow road we once were on?
We went through all this last week. Dear sweet Eli who most everyone sees as a very well behaved child (never gets in trouble at school - he would die! well unless that old Chase or Eli CR tempt him...HAR HAR HAR), mostly polite to adults even when he turns his back to them and looks at me with those eyes like he could burn a hole through me telling me what he really thinks of the situation, can be at times the most strong willed child I've ever seen. And of course it is over the stupidest things ever.
The good part to all this is I have heard other moms say their 8 year old has carried on the same way lately. Crying uncontrollably over the silliest requests from his parents, refusing to do something so easy, being an emotional basketcase, yelling at his parents out of anger. It is truly the sadest thing to go through to realize you have to be the bad guy for awhile to get your child straightened out again. When they tell you that you are mean. When they don't want you to touch them (hug, sitting beside, etc.) when they look at you like they hate you.
But then after a few hours things settle down. Of course when it happends again the true test occurs. Do you go through that hour long disciplining snafu where you are the bad guy, sweating, making quick on the spot decisions about how to handle each curve ball of terror your child throws out at you, going into over time holding your ground, not wavering, not letting them see you falter until they finally cave in and do what was told or apologize to you (or brother) or whatever the problem at hand may be.
So, we continue our voyage down discipline road. It has been a hard week with sweet Eli but Nate and I are determined to work as a team and stick this out. Schools starting back; he is walking the straight and narrow for seven hours each day so I'm sure he's about ready to lose it when he gets home. I'll try to be more patient with my little emotional 2nd grader - BUT I WON'T GO BACK TO THE ZOMBIE ZONE!
What is it? Disciplining your children. When they are young it seems like a daily/hourly chore to stay on top of your child's behavior. They are so (well, mine rather) me focused that you constantly are guiding them to share, apologize, not hit, say thank you. But when they get to that age...you know what that age is...I guess it is different for everyone...you realize "oh, it's been awhile since I had to correct little sammy" or "wow I haven't had to whip out the old tree branch in awhile" (ha ha ha --- had to put that).
I think along the lines of gaining weight slowly you also get used to certain things your children creep back into doing. You get lazy; they get smart or sly or maybe just persistent; you get distracted; they find new ways of doing the same thing. And then one day you realize Little Sammy has not been doing what I ask the first time (or second or third) in quite awhile. Actually, L.S. has been making these horrable whining noises along with rolling his eyes & putting a weird sarcastic tone to all his answers...and I have been in some zombie zone the whole time!
ENOUGH IS ENOUGH...CRACK DOWN! And then excuse my language but all hell brakes loose. The child who has learned that his parents had become zombies to his ill behavior now is having to step up and he doesn't like it. And at that point you have a choice. Do I go back to the numbing sensation of letting my child whine and having to tell him 10 times to do something or do I make a choice now to correct what is wrong and plow back to the straight and narrow road we once were on?
We went through all this last week. Dear sweet Eli who most everyone sees as a very well behaved child (never gets in trouble at school - he would die! well unless that old Chase or Eli CR tempt him...HAR HAR HAR), mostly polite to adults even when he turns his back to them and looks at me with those eyes like he could burn a hole through me telling me what he really thinks of the situation, can be at times the most strong willed child I've ever seen. And of course it is over the stupidest things ever.
The good part to all this is I have heard other moms say their 8 year old has carried on the same way lately. Crying uncontrollably over the silliest requests from his parents, refusing to do something so easy, being an emotional basketcase, yelling at his parents out of anger. It is truly the sadest thing to go through to realize you have to be the bad guy for awhile to get your child straightened out again. When they tell you that you are mean. When they don't want you to touch them (hug, sitting beside, etc.) when they look at you like they hate you.
But then after a few hours things settle down. Of course when it happends again the true test occurs. Do you go through that hour long disciplining snafu where you are the bad guy, sweating, making quick on the spot decisions about how to handle each curve ball of terror your child throws out at you, going into over time holding your ground, not wavering, not letting them see you falter until they finally cave in and do what was told or apologize to you (or brother) or whatever the problem at hand may be.
So, we continue our voyage down discipline road. It has been a hard week with sweet Eli but Nate and I are determined to work as a team and stick this out. Schools starting back; he is walking the straight and narrow for seven hours each day so I'm sure he's about ready to lose it when he gets home. I'll try to be more patient with my little emotional 2nd grader - BUT I WON'T GO BACK TO THE ZOMBIE ZONE!
Aug 11, 2009
Eli starts tomorrow...
So why am I so nervous tonight I could bust into tears any minute? I feel like I have a 1,000 butterflies in my stomach and that I'm about to hurl...I've already exercised, mopped the kitchen, swept the living room floor and washed a load of laundry - it's 9:30pm!!!!
Eli came out of his room around 9:15 fully dressed with shoes on and a huge grin. He can't sleep he's so excited/anxious. At least he isn't crying!
Please just let Mrs. L give him a hug??????? (fat chance)
I guess I will miss my baby after all -
Eli came out of his room around 9:15 fully dressed with shoes on and a huge grin. He can't sleep he's so excited/anxious. At least he isn't crying!
Please just let Mrs. L give him a hug??????? (fat chance)
I guess I will miss my baby after all -
Aug 10, 2009
"It think I can...I think I can...I DID IT!"
I remember sitting at a swimming pool (well actually I wasn't sitting, more like running around and playing in the water) with my toddlers a few years ago and hearing something I'll never forget. Back then I was a bon-a-fide (SP) "mother of preschoolers" - the real kind with a 4 and 2 year old boy (that fact should give me extra points). Not like I am now - mother of school aged children and well a baby.
I hadn't entered the stage of sending my children off to school at the time, realizing how nice it can be (don't you give me that mess about always missing them now...)to get a break and get some stuff done. I was still in the 24/7 no preschool at all (I lived in the country for goodness sake in West Tn.)thinking I was all that and a chocolate chip cookie.
Anyway...there were other mothers there swimming with their kids but one mom with her 4 kids ages raging from 6 to baby (she had twins) made the comment "I CAN'T WAIT FOR SCHOOL TO START BACK!!!" Well I've never!!!! I thought right then that that mother must be horrible. I judged her like a small town beauty queen. But now I could eat my thoughts!
"I can't wait for school to start back." You heard it right here on this blog. In May I stared down these summer months like I was looking into the eyes of a raging bull. I can honestly say I was fearfull of what they would be like. My first summer with three kids...a baby...a baby who I had been spoiled by being at home with by myself for the past 7 months to nap and read and watch the morning news and sip my coffee and visit with friends. But I made it!
I am officially giving myself a pat on the back right now. I overcame my fears of taking three kids to a public pool and packing lunch and feeding them all (baby too) while getting her to sleep in her stroller in the hot sun. I succeeded at taking everyone bowling, to the park, to the Discovery Center - letting my house turn into total chaos as the boys played indoors with all my pillows and sheets and she crawled everywhere trying to eat everything! I drove to my parents by myself with all the kids to stay and visit & even took them all potty at a rest stop for goodness sakes! I did it! I learned to do art projects with everyone and baby in tow; I learned to read books with them while Elizabeth tried to eat the pages; I gave up my naps to spend time with the boys and then stayed awake too late those nights but still was able to get up at 6am the next day! I gave up morning news and am all the better for it. I feel like I've reconnected with my boys and really enjoyed each of them and their very different personalities the past few months.
But now all good things must come to an end (hee hee) and school is ready to begin. I'm just so excited that I made it; that I succeeded this summer. Elizabeth has truly had the best summer hanging out with her big brothers. She loves having them home and watching them play and having them dote all over her. I really wonder how she will make it all day without them here to play with.
So, as the little engine that was so fearful and doubted his ability I too can say "I think I can I think I can I think I can...wait...I DID IT!"
Aug 8, 2009
please give me your opinion...no really I want to know...(not really)
Facebook is funny. you post a status update and then all your "friends" get to either read it, ignore it, or comment on it. Recently I read a friend's status where she was confused over the idea of the school her daughter had tested for kindergarten b/c the school thought the little girl needed to be in Kindergarten Readiness. The mother must have not thought about that alternative for her summer birthday daughter (who was said to not be able to sit still but who scored pretty high on the test). She was just asking for other's opinions. BOY WAS THAT A MISTAKE. She had over 30 people giving her their opinion. I too jumped on the bandwagon simply b/c I for one had my son in that school last year and he too was tested and then suggested he might benefit from Kindergarten Readiness. The difference was that I had planned on putting him in that program (his birthday is Aug. 31st) and then placing him in a different school with his big brother the next year. I just said I thought the program was great for that reason - letting your child mature one more year but yet still teaching them "kindergarten" skills and getting them used to being in a school setting.
I shouldn't have entered the Facebook zone with that topic. I have gotten myself all flustered reading the many comments that keep coming to her request. It's funny most of these "advice givers" haven't expericed the K. R. program but they sure have a lot to say about it..."that's the dumbest thing," "it wasn't here 10 years ago so why do we need it now," "then the child is 6 when they enter K. the next year - how horrable" "why do they expect a 5 year old to sit still" --- what?? Why did I go there? You know everyone has their opinion about everything but usually you keep it to yourself. Giving advice or well wishes is one thing but to give your opinion about doing something in the negative is just plain rude to me. The woman then posted she was more confused then ever and had a headache now...I feel sorry for her though. It is easy to ask for other's opinions on facebook but not always easy to take the 1000 different ones that come shooting through cyberspace into your kitchen!
I am having to be a big girl now. I made my decision for my kids with the whole kindergarten "hold back" or "repeat" or "send them early" debate and I am living through it - successfully for the time being. I know I made the best decision for my boys and they are very happy in school and benefiting from the decision. Would they have been just as sucessful if I hadn't made these decisions - who knows but why go there? So...why read the many opinions of people I don't even know who obviously feel very strongly against what I did then? I won't...and I will NEVER ask the facebook community their oppinion on something in my life from this point on.
Sarah Weeks Callender....is just being. (My status update for 7:21am on Saturday morning)
I shouldn't have entered the Facebook zone with that topic. I have gotten myself all flustered reading the many comments that keep coming to her request. It's funny most of these "advice givers" haven't expericed the K. R. program but they sure have a lot to say about it..."that's the dumbest thing," "it wasn't here 10 years ago so why do we need it now," "then the child is 6 when they enter K. the next year - how horrable" "why do they expect a 5 year old to sit still" --- what?? Why did I go there? You know everyone has their opinion about everything but usually you keep it to yourself. Giving advice or well wishes is one thing but to give your opinion about doing something in the negative is just plain rude to me. The woman then posted she was more confused then ever and had a headache now...I feel sorry for her though. It is easy to ask for other's opinions on facebook but not always easy to take the 1000 different ones that come shooting through cyberspace into your kitchen!
I am having to be a big girl now. I made my decision for my kids with the whole kindergarten "hold back" or "repeat" or "send them early" debate and I am living through it - successfully for the time being. I know I made the best decision for my boys and they are very happy in school and benefiting from the decision. Would they have been just as sucessful if I hadn't made these decisions - who knows but why go there? So...why read the many opinions of people I don't even know who obviously feel very strongly against what I did then? I won't...and I will NEVER ask the facebook community their oppinion on something in my life from this point on.
Sarah Weeks Callender....is just being. (My status update for 7:21am on Saturday morning)
Aug 6, 2009
A stay-cation
I recently experienced a stay cation. I understand this is a new word in the dictionary (or however that works) and also one of the most used words this past year. What is it? (my mom had never heard of the word - AND SHE'S AN ENGLISH PROFESSOR - COME ON MOM!) A stay cation is a vacation where you stay at home or in your hometown to save money! Pretty exciting huh?
Well, Nate and I had planned to save up some extra money we made through a surprise job this summer and go away for the weekend. Perhaps a bed and breakfast close by or a short weekend trip while the kids were taken care of. We decided to use that money for something else and just stay at home for the weekend WITHOUT THE KIDS, besides the fact that I had to factor in a baby that I had to stock up some milk for.
It was all lined up. The boys went to "camp Curve" in West Tn. with my parents for 4 days and Elizabeth stayed sporadically at Nate's parents' house in the near by town. We enjoyed eating out mostly (I refused to cook!) and shopping for school supplies for the kids (that in it self was a treat - no kids and shopping for crayons and notebooks!)
The one big surprise was that Nate had secretly packed an overnight bag for us (don't ask me what was in it - let's just say he did pack my contact case and well that's it...) and gotten us a room at a new hotel in town. I was a little tweaked about the 'spending money' on our stay cation but it wasn't too much and hey, this was my anniversary present for goodness sake Sarah! So we spent a lot of time just being together, watching t.v. in bed, eating a long breakfast (provided by the hotel) and being silly. (I am a lot sillier when my kids aren't around for some reason - and Nate...well Nate is a silly person so he enjoys those silly moments with old Sarah)
We also enjoyed a long Sunday of actually skipping church (something we NEVER do) (as my sister said "well, I'm proud of you Sarah" - which I don't know if I should consider a compliment or not...hee hee) and we went to the lake with friends (who also didn't have their kids) and just rode on a boat and acted like crazy teenagers all day. I actually rode a knee board for the first time and even got "up" the first time - caught some waves, got a little too "proud" and crashed - that was good enough for my knee boarding, crazy teenager experience. Until, I tried out the sea do, where I drove for the first time and truly felt like I was a super hero. I don't think I've ever had so much fun as I did driving that thing.
It's Thursday now and we have had the kids back with us for a few days. I feel refreshed. I feel in love again. I feel like I can do this marriage, parenting, housewife thing a little longer. =)
Well, Nate and I had planned to save up some extra money we made through a surprise job this summer and go away for the weekend. Perhaps a bed and breakfast close by or a short weekend trip while the kids were taken care of. We decided to use that money for something else and just stay at home for the weekend WITHOUT THE KIDS, besides the fact that I had to factor in a baby that I had to stock up some milk for.
It was all lined up. The boys went to "camp Curve" in West Tn. with my parents for 4 days and Elizabeth stayed sporadically at Nate's parents' house in the near by town. We enjoyed eating out mostly (I refused to cook!) and shopping for school supplies for the kids (that in it self was a treat - no kids and shopping for crayons and notebooks!)
The one big surprise was that Nate had secretly packed an overnight bag for us (don't ask me what was in it - let's just say he did pack my contact case and well that's it...) and gotten us a room at a new hotel in town. I was a little tweaked about the 'spending money' on our stay cation but it wasn't too much and hey, this was my anniversary present for goodness sake Sarah! So we spent a lot of time just being together, watching t.v. in bed, eating a long breakfast (provided by the hotel) and being silly. (I am a lot sillier when my kids aren't around for some reason - and Nate...well Nate is a silly person so he enjoys those silly moments with old Sarah)
We also enjoyed a long Sunday of actually skipping church (something we NEVER do) (as my sister said "well, I'm proud of you Sarah" - which I don't know if I should consider a compliment or not...hee hee) and we went to the lake with friends (who also didn't have their kids) and just rode on a boat and acted like crazy teenagers all day. I actually rode a knee board for the first time and even got "up" the first time - caught some waves, got a little too "proud" and crashed - that was good enough for my knee boarding, crazy teenager experience. Until, I tried out the sea do, where I drove for the first time and truly felt like I was a super hero. I don't think I've ever had so much fun as I did driving that thing.
It's Thursday now and we have had the kids back with us for a few days. I feel refreshed. I feel in love again. I feel like I can do this marriage, parenting, housewife thing a little longer. =)
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