Do we just give leftovers?

I've been reading this book "Crazy Love...Overwhelmed by a relentless God" by Francis Chan. To say it is challenging me is an understatement.

I'm currently in the chapter titled "Serving Leftovers To A Holy God." I'm going to write just a few statements that have struck me here and then I'll comment.

"If one hundred people represented the world's population, fifty-three of those would live on less then $2 a day. Do you realize that if you make $4,000 a month, you automatically make one hundred times more than the average person on this planet? Which is more messed up - that we have so much compared to everyone else, or that we don't think we're rich? That on any given day we might flippantly call ourselves 'broke' or 'poor'? We are neither of those things. We are rich. Filthy rich." (pg. 89)

Robert Murray M'Cheyne, a Scottish pastor in the nineteenth century said this..."I am concerned for the poor but more for you. I know not what Christ will say to you in the great day...I fear there are many hearing me who may know well that they are not Christians because they do not love to give. To give largely and liberally, not grudgingly at all, requires a new heart; an old heart would rather part with its life-blood than its money. Oh my friends! Enjoy your money; make the most of it; give none away; enjoy it quickly for I can tell you, you will be beggars throughout eternity." As William Wilberforce once said, "Prosperity hardens the heart."

I read these words and others in the chapter and thought a lot about my heart and giving. Then I got to be tested.

Nate and I are planning to take a small trip with the family to Chattanooga to the aquarium and stay in a hotel for the weekend. Now once you add it up this is no small feat for a one income family but with my preschool paycheck it can be easily done in saving for one month. I got my first check of the month this past week. Not soon after Nate and I were talking about the need to give to the Haitians. He said he thought we should give what we would have spent for the weekend trip and I guess upon seeing my face he added, "think about it, we would take a trip to a hotel and eat at restaurants and go to museums for two days for the amount of money that could give so many people tents, water, food and medical care." Of course that was enough for me to hear to wake up out of my fat and lazy stupor and get on board. How easy for me to save next month and go on the trip. But how funny that even in the midst of reading this book and being challenged when it came down to it I wanted to hold tight to my money. Sure I wanted to give before to the relief effort but give so much? Give my trip this month?

This is what it talks about in the bible that we read so easily but then turn the cheek. I hear so many friends say including me, "the more you make the more it disappears." Why is that? Why do we hold so tight to what is not ours? Why is it so hard to give till it hurts but easy to throw pennies at a cause when it won't effect our way of living?

I had passed by an e-mail from a friend asking for clothes for a woman and her two kids whose house burned last week. Her husband was killed and they have nothing. Her church was collecting for her. I actually passed by the e-mail thinking I would come back to it later. Come back to helping this woman by just reading exactly what she needed and taking the time to go through my closet. While she waited with nothing for someone out there to help.

Nate saw the e-mail today and commented, "don't you have this size clothes?" I looked again at the message and my heart was struck. When Elizabeth laid down for a nap I went to my closet and started pulling out pants and sweaters and shoes and shirts all in her size that I haven't worn in years. I have a heaping pile of clothes now to give this woman because I stopped my "busy life" and thought about someone else in need. Why is it so hard sometimes? But when you do it it feels so good!

I'm not writing this to pat myself on the back. I'm writing this to admit that even I have a hard time giving till it hurts. I'm good at giving my leftovers but that is not what God wants. We who have much, much is expected! (my paraphrase)