Overcoming a fear...with the help of Daddy!

There is a side to Eli, my oldest son, that not a lot of people know. I talk about it but most of my friends don't believe me I think. It is the super shy, super anxious, super timid child who doesn't like being out of his comfort zone. COMFORT ZONE = HAVING A CLOSE FRIEND OR FAMILY MEMBER DO EVERYTHING WITH HIM. Yes, he can break dance on stage at school - with his friends by his side. He can lead a group at school - with his friends by his side. He can star in a soccer game - with his friends by his side. BUT...ask the boy to go to a new friends house down the street to play...and HE HIDES IN THE CLOSET WITH THE TRASH CAN.

That's right. Remember the post about me bringing a new boy to our house that lived down the street to play with Eli (his little sister is friends with Ian so they all came over one day). He had so much fun playing with the boy but like I said, I had to literally bring the boy to our house without Eli knowing and say "look Eli, here is a new friend - go play!"

Well that same boy and his sister and mom showed up at our door two days ago and asked if Eli and Ian could ride down to their house and play for a little while. YOU WOULD HAVE THOUGHT WE TOLD ELI HE WAS BEING ADOPTED BY THIS NEW FAMILY AND WE WOULD NEVER SEE HIM AGAIN. He cried on the spot, threw himself down, then ran and hid. I politely told the mom that my oldest son was a little shy about new places and maybe another time. She asked if she could talk to him. I said sure. We found him hiding in the closet with the trash can. He of course put on a fake smile and politely said he didn't want to go. So we walked outside (me very embarrassed and this mom - I'm sure thinking "what's up with him?") She was nice and told me "all kids are different" (she has 4 of them). But you see Nate was home...

When Nate asked where Eli was I told him - you know hiding in the closet. Well that wouldn't work...

Nate went in said a few words to Eli and came back outside. I heard more tears, saw an angry ANGRY Eli come flying outside - get on his bike - try to run me over in the driveway - gurgle out some very evil sounding words like "dad is soooo mean" and then ride off. I honestly thought I would cry. I knew this would just add to the many counseling sessions he is already going to have when he is an adult and finally realizes everything wrong with him is my fault. So I went in the kitchen and almost threw up.

Well....about 30 minutes later when supper was ready Nate walked down to get the boys.

I waited...

In comes Eli first through the door. He was.....SMILING...and began to tell me all about the fun games that family has. (They have three older boys - of course they have a yard full of fun games).

I asked if he was OK? He smiled and said yes. I asked if he was glad we made (your father made) him go? He said yes.

Maybe that will be one less counseling visit he has to make. And maybe he is one step closer to overcoming his fear of new things - with the help of his Daddy!