Overcoming a fear...with the help of Daddy!

There is a side to Eli, my oldest son, that not a lot of people know. I talk about it but most of my friends don't believe me I think. It is the super shy, super anxious, super timid child who doesn't like being out of his comfort zone. COMFORT ZONE = HAVING A CLOSE FRIEND OR FAMILY MEMBER DO EVERYTHING WITH HIM. Yes, he can break dance on stage at school - with his friends by his side. He can lead a group at school - with his friends by his side. He can star in a soccer game - with his friends by his side. BUT...ask the boy to go to a new friends house down the street to play...and HE HIDES IN THE CLOSET WITH THE TRASH CAN.

That's right. Remember the post about me bringing a new boy to our house that lived down the street to play with Eli (his little sister is friends with Ian so they all came over one day). He had so much fun playing with the boy but like I said, I had to literally bring the boy to our house without Eli knowing and say "look Eli, here is a new friend - go play!"

Well that same boy and his sister and mom showed up at our door two days ago and asked if Eli and Ian could ride down to their house and play for a little while. YOU WOULD HAVE THOUGHT WE TOLD ELI HE WAS BEING ADOPTED BY THIS NEW FAMILY AND WE WOULD NEVER SEE HIM AGAIN. He cried on the spot, threw himself down, then ran and hid. I politely told the mom that my oldest son was a little shy about new places and maybe another time. She asked if she could talk to him. I said sure. We found him hiding in the closet with the trash can. He of course put on a fake smile and politely said he didn't want to go. So we walked outside (me very embarrassed and this mom - I'm sure thinking "what's up with him?") She was nice and told me "all kids are different" (she has 4 of them). But you see Nate was home...

When Nate asked where Eli was I told him - you know hiding in the closet. Well that wouldn't work...

Nate went in said a few words to Eli and came back outside. I heard more tears, saw an angry ANGRY Eli come flying outside - get on his bike - try to run me over in the driveway - gurgle out some very evil sounding words like "dad is soooo mean" and then ride off. I honestly thought I would cry. I knew this would just add to the many counseling sessions he is already going to have when he is an adult and finally realizes everything wrong with him is my fault. So I went in the kitchen and almost threw up.

Well....about 30 minutes later when supper was ready Nate walked down to get the boys.

I waited...

In comes Eli first through the door. He was.....SMILING...and began to tell me all about the fun games that family has. (They have three older boys - of course they have a yard full of fun games).

I asked if he was OK? He smiled and said yes. I asked if he was glad we made (your father made) him go? He said yes.

Maybe that will be one less counseling visit he has to make. And maybe he is one step closer to overcoming his fear of new things - with the help of his Daddy!

He will equip us...

I am a very controlling person. I admit it. My husband reminds me of it about once a week (bless him). So, when approached recently about serving in my MOPS group in a position I had never considered I shuddered. As a controlling type person I like to be in charge. I like to feel confident in what I am responsible for - I like to know that I KNOW how to do what I have to do. But this position is something new, something different, something I don't KNOW how to do. At first I said no. Then I said no again. Then I found myself filling out the paperwork to do the position, wondering the whole time "why am I doing this?" There was some prayer in between all those wondering moments. Still I never had a peace about it.

Then I read something that I think will help anyone reading this with life choices they have to make that they too feel they aren't 'in control' of or aren't 'capable' of. Forgive me for copying but I will give credit to the author Priscilla Shirer in the bible study "Anointed Transformed Redeemed - A study of David." "We must come to our situations knowing that God equips for His purpose those He calls. He didn't select us to lead the study, mother the children, marry the man, lead the meeting, run the office, or start the ministry because He knew we were already capable. Rather, He picked us up, dusted off our incapability, replaced it with His ability, and secured our success when we chose to rest and trust in Him to work supernaturally in us."

WOW! You mean God knew that I didn't know what the lick I was doing when I started mothering my kids or even got into this marriage thing? That He was helping me all the while I was changing diapers, teaching my little ones, trying to forgive my husband (for not waking up last night when the baby cried on and on). WOW! God cares that much about me?

Still more..."He never gives a blessing, extends a gift, offers an opportunity, or creates a solution without a specific purpose. Those whom God has handpicked for a specific calling, established with His power, and anointed by His Spirit have been given that privilege of being a conduit (high school science term) through which those blessings can flow to others."

You mean it's not ALL ABOUT ME? He is using me to touch others and through my weakness and inability He shows Himself. COOL!

"The Father loves people, not programs. Any program He initiates and or assignment He commissions you to do always has this as its main goal turning people to a relationship with Himself. MOTHERING IS NOT THE ULTIMATE GOAL OF BEING A MOM, REVEALING CHRIST TO THE CHILDREN IS. The position of leader in the career or ministry is not the goal, those in your sphere of influece seeing God's love reflected in you is."

What did I get from that? Yes, being the new creative activities leader in my MOPS group is intimidating and daunting b/c I don't know if I can do it well but will He help me? Yes. Will He grow me in this ministry as I trust in Him and not my own talents to get the job done? Yes. Is the purpose to lead moms in crafts? No - but to show His love through my position. This can be applied to anything you do. Jobs, Mothering, Marriage, Friendships with hard to get along friends, Neighbors -

I have a peace now about fulfilling this position and trying something new that is out of my comfort zone. I'm glad I have that peace on my side b/c of my Father. What about you?

A new blog

I finally put all my canvas pictures on a blog for potential customers to check out. The name is from a nickname that runs in my family "punkin" and I thought it sounded cuter then "creative canvases" (also that name was taken in the long lists of blogs). punkinpiepaintings.blogspot.com
I plan on blogging about new canvases I'm working on so check it out every so often! Pass it on to friends too - thanks!!

He's 8

Eli is 8 today! He's the jokester, the center of attention, the sheepherder of his little brother & sister, the shy child, the crazy child; he's a leader, an artist, a cuddeler, a great swimmer. He's the most stubborn child ever, still has a will made of kryptonite, hates to be wrong about anything,loves his friends more then anything! He might have lost that toe headed hair, that mommy you know everything attitude and that bashful personality but Eli...you are still my special buddy!

Shout Out to a very talented woman

I would like to throw a spotlight on a lovely woman whom I get to know more each year I visit with her. She is Nate's cousin but now a friend of mine as well. I have never met such a talented woman other then my mother and Martha Stewart. She can sew anything, bakes from scratch, can discuss some of the most fascinating topics and sound very knowledgeable at the same time (thanks for the conversation Saturday night about foods and herbal remedies!) as well as paint so beautifully! She blessed me with two wonderful gifts this weekend during our little getaway to visit family and the Georgia Aquarium: first a handmade baby sling that is color coordinated with a diaper bag I have (I'm so totally cool now) and a copy of a painting she did of her kids in a creek (it is hanging in our living room now). She has two websites that you have to check out www.handmade-adelaide-baby.com for her unique ideas she has gathered on making baby gifts for others or for your own use. And www.thebrownbrush.com showcases her paintings. She has a new business where she can take a photo you give her and using her computer 'paint' over the picture (adding new things, tweaking stuff, changing colors) and print it on canvas so that it looks like it was painted. I can't wait for Elizabeth to turn one and I'm going to have her paint a picture of all the kids together!
This is just a shout out to you Gwen - thanks for hosting us and being such an inspiration to me as a new artist, a creative seeking mother and a now much more health conscience woman! Love you!
Side note: this picture is of all the cousins in Atlanta that we saw Saturday morning - thanks Heidi for hosting breakfast - hope we didn't trash the kids' rooms!

juggling...people

I've had six hours at home by myself with Elizabeth. Let me say first though, "the honeymoon is over." Not in a "I'm over having a baby" kind of way but rather in a "she doesn't just lay in a swing all day" anymore kind of way. Get it? I have to move her from one piece of entertainment equipment to another every few minutes when she tires of jumping or rocking or watching the bubbles or laying on the floor. Then we go for a walk in the neighborhood to look at the birds (while I listen to my ipod so I don't feel the need to fill the quite air with the same nursery rhymes over and over). Finally she takes a nap - a real one - not one of those 20 minute things where I get totally mad b/c I was fooled into starting a project only to hear her crying for me. So, I get as much done as I can during what turns out to be a 2 hour nap (long for sister girl) - balance checkbook, pay bills, wash 10 loads of laundry at least (all day mind you), look at two canvases waiting for me to put a second coat of paint on them (not now but later I tell myself), write e-mails back to people, actually write a status update on face book (darn that face book), fold clothes again, make desert for MOPS meeting, clean boys bedroom and then sit down for lunch and the beginning of LOST that I dvr'd last night. And she wakes up - but that is okay b/c I'm happy for all that was accomplished.
But then the afternoon bell rings and the second part of my day begins. The part where I'm a mother to multiple children. It happens fast that transition from baby momma to referee, coach, teacher, cafeteria worker, maid, janitor, police officer, playmate (I could keep going). I make the kids go outside to play before the storm hits and we have a great time swinging with Elizabeth in my lap and the boys chat it up with me about their day. Then we come inside and the juggling begins. After unsuccessfully trying to get Elizabeth down for a much needed nap and breaking up a fight between the boys playing the PlayStation (tears all around at this point) I pull out the board games. Operation first then Guess who. I'm feeling like an awesome mom. We're watching the weather report as I anticipate an afternoon of tornadoes and hope that Nate gets home soon to relieve me of the sole responsibility of mom of multiple children. At one point Eli is reading a book out loud for school (and wanting me to look at him and the pictures with every word) while I'm still playing Operation with Ian (who also wants me to pay attention to the fact that he only electrocuted the patient three times) and Elizabeth is about to lose it (screaming at me periodically as she is juggled from the floor to my lap in an effort to keep her happy when she really needs to take a nap!) Then to top it all off Nate calls me and says "You won't believe what happened to me this afternoon..." So, I try very hard to listen attentively with all the "oh my" and "that sounds rough" comments I can muster along with "Yes Eli, good" and "My turn Ian - that was a great job" and "It's okay Elizabeth - don't lose it on me"...
But the day is over now and everyone is in a bed (no not their bed but rather ours, together, because it is thundering outside and they are scared - yes, it is 9pm...) but officially the day is over and I made it!