Sister girl turns one

Well the year has passed by quickly. On Wednesday sister girl will roll over a new leaf and join the official aged ones with a big number 1. (you know as opposed to being counted in months - which totally confuses the boys!)

I'm not in a real sappy mood right now so I can't spit out much for you...it has been a great year though and honestly she has been the easiest baby out of all three! She has been toted everywhere under the sun and with the help of a great daddy and two awesome big brothers the work load of a third child has not been as bad as I feared!

She is such a little sunshine in our family (something my Granny used to call me - ohhhhh, now I"m getting sappy...I shall keep typing). She smiles first thing in the morning, loves to wave at everyone, has eyes that mesmerize you, will sleep anywhere, eats black beans for goodness sakes (had to throw that in there for you K.) and is tough as nails (let us all remember that one!) She has been through more her first year then many of us ever will from a medical standpoint and still faces down her two big brothers for a derby race in the backyard that led to a wreck and some grass in the mouth only to wipe it off with a few tears and want back on!

I can only imagine what she will be like as she gets older and I can't wait to sit back (well chase after) and watch her as she takes hold of life by the horns and rides it out!

How was that for unintentional sappy? Happy Birthday sister girl...

The dress...

I had posted on face book my woes over this "pillow case dress" because I saw how simple it could be made (if one could actually sew) and I saw what they were charging in the store for it ($35). So as I know how to do...I called my own Martha Stewart (no, not Linda aka:mom or nanna but Mrs. Evelyn aka: Grandmama or GG to the next generation). Sure enough she was up for it. So after a little Internet browsing we found the pattern and some pictures for her; I went and bought super cheap on sale material and ribbon then mailed it to her; she whipped it up and I paid $5 from a friend to sew an applique and her initial on it. So, for under $7.00 I have the following for Elizabeth. It was her special birthday dress and will be used for Halloween parties, Thanksgiving dinner and activities as well as the next three years since it can be let down with the ribbon...THANKS G.G.!!!





Oh, and by the way...I encouraged her to make a couple more and sell them. So I have a ton of Christmas dresses (super cute) that I'm selling for her for $20. They will literally fit any little girl from one year of age to prbably 4 depending on how tall she is.

Monster Mash

After all my self created hype over the movie "Where the wild things are" I wanted to let everyone know it was the worse kids movie I've ever seen! You can go on to different movie reviews and read other's opinions (there are many mind you) but for this mini-van driving momma of three..."Don't see it!" To sum it up: it should have been sponsored by Prozac for an intro. to psychology class; it was a great showcase of the split family lifestyle that many children deal with but that I don't particularly want my children to see first hand on the big screen; it dealt with very real and hard core emotions that a young boy was wrestling with b/c of a single parent working household - a scream for attention and dysfunctionality (did I just make up that word?) My eight year old said he was scared during the movie and my six year cried at the end because it was so sad. At one point I told the mommas beside me "if that monster tries to eat the little boy we are grabbing our kids and running" and yes, the monster tried to eat the little boy and it terrified everyone but we made it through the scene without jumping up. Best quote of the night from another eight year old "mom, if I had run away after biting you I wouldn't have gotten chocolate cake when I came back home!" NO YOU WOULDN'T HAVE BUT YOU WOULD HAVE GOTTEN A BIG OLD SPANKING! hee hee

But we did have a fun monster mash party at our house afterwards with costumes, a few games and hot dogs...I hope enough to wash away any memories the movie may have left!

should I really be posting this?

Well, after many months of discussing (I mean me talking at him) and getting a blank stare in return or actually a "would you please stop talking about this" comment, my husband decided on his own timing that he would get the deal sealed. I mean finish the job for good. Or rather terminate his baby making ability inevitably. =) The big V.

Once he told me he then made the appointment that week, went in and scheduled the thing for his Fall break and had it done Monday. He's a to the point kind of guy!

I'm not the compassionate type but neither is he really (we have to be on our death bed to take a nap while the kids are ALL awake in the middle of the day) so it all has worked out.

I dropped him off at the doctor's office and told the nurse to call me when it was over. I had errands to run. When me and Elizabeth went to get him the doctor told me Nate wanted to watch the whole thing - doesn't surprise me a bit. He is the same man who actually delivered our second child by himself...yes, he did it all! Let's just say I had some good pain meds and the doctor and he got real buddy buddy at some of the visits over the months.

I was warned that my man might milk it for all it was worth but I have to say I have been surprised with him. He has followed doctor's orders, staying in bed for two days with just a few trips to the fridge and to eat dinner with us at the table on the second day. He hasn't whined nor has he made me feel guilty for what he is going through (I actually do feel a little bad but then I remind myself of those hours of labor and delivery for THREE of his offspring!)

He has watched almost the whole Lord of the Rings trilogy and read some for school. And even though I know he is in pain I did have some evil thoughts towards the sweet man as I was on hour 36 of single parenting. But the kids are all in bed, his movie is still playing and I'm sitting in my pjs typing on my blog. I shouldn't complain ---

So, I guess unless things don't work right I am through birthing children. I think that means I have a tummy tuck in my future doesn't it? Hey, will I get to stay in bed for 48 hours after that procedure? If so....I'm there!

why do we do it to ourselves, really?

I was working at preschool today and at the moment just standing outside a classroom getting ready to once again ride my wooden pony into the room and start galloping around to get the kids all energized (that is what creative movement is all about right? Getting the children energized). At that same time a mother was pushing her baby in a stroller through the double doors while holding a giant box; she then proceeded to sign in as a visitor. I asked her if she would like some help and she turned me down while proudly showing me the elaborate cowboy cookies she had obviously made from scratch and decorated. (It was cowboy day) She felt the need to explain why the 'black icing didn't turn out quite like she wanted' and then me and another teacher laughingly said "I hope those kids get a good look at the cookie before they eat it." We all laughed again but then the proud cookie momma strolled down the hall to present her achievement to the teachers. I later saw those cookies not eaten but laid out on the nameplates for the kids to take home (and hopefully for some more mommas to see).

It made me think...why do we do it to ourselves, really?

I remember my first experience with the whole preschool thing. Eli was only 2 and his preschool only lasted 2 1/2 hours twice a week but the worries it put me through - oh my! Each holiday was a class party. All the mommas were in the classroom with their 'dishes' and 'treats' for the party. But the big thing was the gifts they seem to had gotten in a tradition of giving. Every mother gave each child a treat bag full of stuff. Short on money and being a new timer at the whole mother thing I was very overwhelmed. I pulled myself together that Christmas though and decided I would out do everyone. I bought some red and green felt, spent hours cutting little stocking shapes out and hand sewing them together (I can't use a sewing machine). Then I wrote every child's name on one with puffy paint. I managed to put a few pieces of candy in each one and delivered them to the party that week. I'm sad to say that those stockings were the most pitiful looking things I've ever seen (looking back) and I found out later I could have just bought some really fancy looking ones at the dollar tree! But I thought I had to do it.

As mothers we sometimes get in our heads that we have to go over the top. Whether it be volunteering to chair each class party for the year or just simply spending hours decorating a cookie for 20 children who will probably throw it away after the second bite and move onto the next snack; we as mothers put this absurd pressure on ourselves. Now, I have to say that not everyone will succumb to this pressure. And, thankfully, some of us will do it a few times and then come to our senses and never do it again.

I guess it also depends on if that is your thing! If you like to cook or decorate or sew or paint or volunteer to organize that food list then that is what you should do. It is just funny if we don't admit to ourselves that we are partly doing it to impress other mothers along with providing something a little special for our kids.

I don't think any of the other mothers in the room will know whose mom spent the hours making those decorated cowboy boot cookies; and the kids eating them may or may not stop to admire the painted icing that was so carefully decorated on that cooked dough, but I suppose it is all worth it if that mom felt some kind of satisfaction from accomplishing the task.

As for me...I will never hand make stockings for two year olds ever again! But I may just plan a really cool Halloween party in my backyard with lots of crazy games and throw in a few easy bake cookies!

The CEO of your house?

I've been thinking a lot lately about the role of a woman - well that isn't a role but it should be! The role of a wife, a mother, a stay-at-home mother to be even more specific. It all started from a comment given to a friend of mine in an interview recently. Let me digress for a minute...

So, this friend has been a stay at home mom (with a side job here and there mind you) for the past 8 years and now due to a recent layoff of her husband and more recently a career change equalling in half the salary he once made, she has stepped up to the plate (so to speak) and decided to stop working (3) part time jobs; but, rather to put her high heels and business suits back on, drive her minivan back onto the interstate and go back to work at a "use your full brain, don't have to wipe booties or little noses, no jumping up and down and telling other women to get their heart rates up job." When she was interviewing her soon to be boss (a newly married woman in her 40's with no kids) said, "so you have been out of the H.R. field for 8 years?" Friend: "yes, I've been a stay at home mom (I'm making this up). Boss: "Oh, you mean you've been the CEO of your house?" Friend: "ohhhh, yessssss (and then she went on to say "I can potty train any of your employees if you would like?") She cracks me up!

It was that comment "You've been the CEO of your household for eight years," that got me thinking.

What a daunting, never-ending, multi-tasking, exhausting, frustrating, full of blessings job we have as that stay at home mom with preschoolers - or just as a mom in general. Note: to any of you reading this that are moms of preschoolers who work full time outside the home - I just can't relate to you in my writing but know this...I honestly don't see how you do it. I admire you for doing what you feel led or called or want or have to do. You do all this I'm writing about plus go to work each day - how how how how do you do it?

The job of a mother alone is never ending! Reflecting on my own life and role in this CEO position I have realized I never just sit - I'm never just being and nothing else (blogging doesn't count!). I'm always either washing, folding or putting up 5 people's clothes; loading or unloading the dishwasher; planning, shopping or cooking a meal 3'x a day; dusting, vacuuming, sweeping or mopping something up; storing away the ending season's clothes, measuring children, then shopping for new clothes; scheduling every one's doctor's apt, dentist apts, hair cut apts, vehicle apts, parent teacher apts; keeping up with EVERYONE ON BOTH SIDES OF THE FAMILIES' birthdays and getting their presents (sorry they are so often late); staying on top of homework due the next day, tests the next week, projects due soon, field trips, permission forms, money due, volunteering in the classroom or for the PTC or for the preschool or for the church or for cub scouts or for sports clubs. We go on play dates, take our kids to the park, play catch or tractors or house, bake cookies and eat them; we rock, nurse, sing and read to them. We balance out the boring stuff that has to get done with the fun stuff that makes memories.

(Let me say here that my husband does a great deal of this stuff but I am definitely the one who keeps us on schedule, up to date, and on top of these things. I love that I can call Nate and ask him to pick up the kids, take a sick child to the doctor, volunteer to coach, meet me for a parent/teacher meeting, swing by the grocery store (with e-mailed list in hand), or work on homework with a child...he is more then willing and great at it - BUT I am after all the CEO of this house and it seems to be my job to keep us on track.)

I do feel though as moms we don't really give ourselves a break. I honestly don't think we have time to get many breaks. After all isn't there always something you could be doing??? Cleaning out that closet, throwing away those expired medicines,collecting the clothes that are out grown for the union mission, or just reading another book to your child and rocking a baby even after they have fallen asleep.

Watching my friend "go back to work in the real world" makes me realize this time at home with little ones is short lived. Even though it is never ending at the time it truly does come to completion at some point. I do hope that the skills I learn as the CEO of my household with all my little ones in tow will keep me on top of things and ready to do whatever life calls me to when I reach that next stage in my life, whether it be wearing high heals again or something new that I've never dreamed of.

But until then...let me wish good luck to my dear friend who is hanging up her preschool slippers and putting back on her pointed toe heels - job well done!

every child needs to visit a farm...or two

It's an annual tradition in the South to take your children to a working farm in the Fall. Usually preschool or kindergarten classes make this an annual fieldtrip but this Fall our family decided to pick up the slack of the school system and do it ourselves.
Pumpkin picking, hayrides, petting animals, hay and corn mazes...this is what the start of the Fall season is all about.






It's funny how I always get emotional when I visit a farm. I start thinking of how I would love to buy some land and build a house (or move into an older farm house to fix up)and get away from the suburbs. How quiet it is just listening to the trees blow in the wind and the insects chirping. All the open land for the kids to run and not worry about the neighbor's property a few yards over. But like most people I have grown spoiled by living in the city; being down the road from Kroger and a gas station is just too convenient. Just a few minutes from our church or the university has made me lazy. Being able to leave as late as possible to get the kids to school is just too easy. Maybe one day we will move out there...away from it all. Maybe it will force us to slow down a little, to plan ahead more, to stay together longer. Maybe we'll even get a few sheep, a dog and some baby chickens! If so I'll invite you over when Fall officially begins and we'll go on our own hayride!

"Where the wild things are"

Have you heard?
Where the wild things are is coming to the theaters.

I've been watching the trailers all night! I even decided to throw our own monster mash party. I'm going to invite some of the boys' friends to watch the movie and then come over in costume for a little monster mash - "let the wild rompus start"! That book makes me cry it is so sweet. I haven't been this excited about a children's movie in years! I hope it doesn't disappoint!

I'm going to go get the book out of the boys' room and read it now...

to do disney or not to do disney that is the question!

It's fall break...do you know what that means? It means looking at your facebook each day to see where your friends are going in the land of Disney that hour! That's what it means!

No really I'm not jealous. Really! Well...

I was told that one doesn't 'get' Disney if one never went there as a child. It ruins the idea of Disneyland forever! I believe it to an extent.

I for one never went. I got to visit Magic Kingdom (is that what it is called?) with my mom and sister when I was a sophomore in college (and I'm sorry to admit a little bit hungover from a late night outing with friends before my mother picked me up in Georgia. I still remember sleeping the whole drive to Florida after mom had just driven all the way from West Tn. to pick me up! College students - they are worthless creatures!) The magic wasn't there I admit. There were too many little kids in line, whining the whole time and everything looked very small to me. It was too late for me. The damage had been done.

Now, my husband on the other hand tells me he went as a young child and doesn't remember anything but that scary ride they all talk about "space mountain" (I remember it as a 20 year old thinking what a not scary ride!). He has no fond memories at all...I don't know what happened to him!

But now we have three children. Two of which are at the prime age for Disneyland. But we also have one father who says he doesn't want to waste over $3,000 on a week long vacation to ride rides, wait in line, etc. when we could spend that money on going somewhere else fun as a family.

But everyone else is doing it!!!!!! Me and the boys whine!

I see his point to an extent (remember I'm the ruined no Disney child experienced one here)and can totally see us laying on the beach (well chasing Elizabeth on a beach) in Mexico for $3000 or rather on a cruise (and letting someone else chase Elizabeth - that's what they do right?) for a week in say Alaska or Hawaii. But then are we just continuing the hex on the next generation in our family? Will our children be ruined then and carry on to their children the lack of Disney experiences in their young minds?

I got a text last night from a dear friend who said "____ just finished having dinner with Cinderella. We know Elizabeth will have fun being a princess one day too!" OHHHHHH...that about made me cry! So, of course I had to pick the debate back up with Nate. But I don't think I won it.

It's also funny that some people are Disney addicts (say, above friends - no offense to you friends). Those people who go every other year or so and know all the secrets to getting the tickets and times they want. Then there are those families who save for years and make a huge production out of it when the time comes (kids, no Christmas this year -- we are going to Disney!) And then there are the Callenders. Poor Callender kids...although Nate did ask me if there was a Disney cruise last night? There is still hope!!!!!